Thursday, December 4, 2008

Black Mesa Mod for HL1

Dude. This looks so good.









The word is that you can play this mod using a Steam account with any Source engine game installed. That means that you could replay the entire first Half-Life game with the update Source engine.

Posted via email from jromi's posterous

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Palin's Subscriptions


Hilarious.

I laugh now.

20 years from now I will look back and shudder, then wait for my robot overlord to read me a magazine.

Posted by email from jromi's posterous

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Microbloggy


Haven't been 'macro' blogging much these days, as I've been consumed with exploring time-wasting appliances like Twitter, Ubiquity, Twinkle, Posterous, and the like. If I ever want to be on the Obama team, they will need to know about that Fight Club posting I made with regards to desiring Dick Cheney's participation.

Also want to see how Posterous handles this post, since it's coming from email. I hear that it renders a video-related URL (like YouTube) into a player. There's also some support for playing video and audio files. Soon everyone will be able to experience the song or comedy routine I'm listening to in the morning.

Too bad I don't have an available wi-fi network at work, else I'd leverage my iPhone's AirSharing app to serve up some rich content for the masses.

Here's a simple URL that takes you to a lovely experience of Patton Oswalt writing up his experience of trying one of his failure bowls.

And with an associated video URL

I'll have to test how it interprets mp3s later.

Do it internets. Make it happennnnnnnnnnow!

Posted by email from jromi's posterous

Friday, November 7, 2008

Plug for my aunt

My aunt's doing her bit to get a handle on emissions, and is now at a company that sells hardware for your car, so you can improve your fuel efficiency and reduce emissions. Apparently, you can even use these on your existing hybrid to make it an uber-hybrid.

Products are here. They are all of the Electronic Fuel Injection Enhancment family. Information on them are here.

The crazy adventures of Biblely!

Prop 8 passed, while folks in CA voted heavily for Obama. It was truly ironic that much of the support came from Black and Latino voters, who have the unpleasant historical experience of having their civil rights restricted by the state because of the color of their skin.

Huh?

Morford has an excellent commentary on it, that about sums up the reason why it failed. Of course

Excerpts:
Some say the inglorious success of Prop. 8, the brutally regressive measure that removes the rights of very specific people who love very specific other people from ever marrying them, can be blamed on multiple factors.
...
Or maybe it's all those sad, white, central portions of the state, the huge chunks of voters who live in places without much culture or perspective or major universities, who only hear certain strains of spiteful rhetoric and thin fearmongering, whose general lack of education means they apparently still believe certain flavors of love will poison everyone's soup and ruin the sanctity of the time-honored 50-percent heterosexual missionary position Christian divorce rate.
...
[...]I think the real blame lies with, well, the Almighty himself.
...
Behind it all, it's God. No, not the god you and I understand as a universal, non-gendered, asexual, love-drunk energy coursing through all things at all times everywhere without the slightest wisp of prejudice or geographical preference, but that famously small, myopic version, the one that encourages a literalist interpretation of very carefully selected Bible verse (to the complete disregard of myriad others) -- a version that, in short, has been drilled into the consciousness of far too many voters for far too long.

Is it not true? Once again this election, in pulpits across America, the call rang out: We must stop the gays. We cannot allow them entry into the sanctuary of Eternal Hetero Love. After all, marriage is (these people believe) the last upstanding Christian stronghold, the final barrier preventing America from becoming some sort of Sodom-iffic nipple-pierced polyamorous rave party where anyone can marry anything and pets are running scared and people stick parts of their bodies into other people's parts for sexual pleasure. The horror.
My take on it: restricting civil rights using a simple majority vote is un-American. That, and the simple fact that nothing is removed or lessened for heterosexual relationships should gay people marry.

What would Mr. Show do?

Or Senator Tankerbell? You gotta watch it to get the Bibley reference.

Fanboys: Harry Knowles is kicking Window's ass

Extreme Star Wars dork pleasure, or failed montage of sci-fi heroes? Darth Vader would no doubt find my lack of faith disturbing.

I can almost see Shatner's ego greedily chomping at the margins of the film.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

We're all growns up, and have lots of work ahead

We Baracked the vote. We are a better nation for it.

Here's some commentary on the GOP and its future:
Conservatives also must decide whether a return to their core economic beliefs will be accompanied by a hard right turn on social issues such as gay rights, guns and abortion. Some feel that Sen. John McCain wasn't conservative enough socially.

Regardless, for Republicans to rebound, they must catch up to Democrats in online organizing and fundraising - a shortcoming made clear in this election.

"The Republican Party is teetering on the brink of irrelevancy," said Professor Lawrence R. Jacobs, director of the Center for the Study of Politics and Governance at the University of Minnesota. "This is about as close to a repudiation as you can get."

What will follow, Jacobs said, "will be a period of bloodletting in the Republican Party. It's going to be a free-for-all, professional wrestling battle royal."
...
Dick Armey of Texas knows what it is like to revive the Republican Party. A former majority leader in the U.S. House of Representatives, Armey was one of the leaders of the 1994 "Republican revolution" that seized Capitol Hill after two years of a Democratically controlled Congress and White House.

"They need to get back to what worked in the past," said Armey. "We should start by asking ourselves, 'What were we doing when people loved us?' And it's been a long time since some people in this country loved us."
...
Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin's future appears mixed. Armey said, "It's hard for me to tell where she will fit in." Franc said, "She's the young athlete who makes it to the big leagues who has 'lots of upside.' " Hawkins called her "a rock star."

Jacobs said: "There's been a lot of hyperventilating about her. But once cooler heads look back on her, she will be seen as destructive to the ticket and more abysmal than (former Vice President Dan) Quayle. There has never been a vice presidential candidate as unpopular as Sarah Palin.'"
GOP has 8 years of Bush to thank for lost love. Even now, Bushco is working on getting his final nail in the coffin with deregulatory measures.
The White House is working to enact a wide array of federal regulations, many of which would weaken government rules aimed at protecting consumers and the environment, before President Bush leaves office in January.
The new rules would be among the most controversial deregulatory steps of the Bush era and could be difficult for his successor to undo. Some would ease or lift constraints on private industry, including power plants, mines and farms.
Those and other regulations would help clear obstacles to some commercial ocean-fishing activities, ease controls on emissions of pollutants that contribute to global warming, relax drinking-water standards and lift a key restriction on mountaintop coal mining.
Once such rules take effect, they typically can be undone only through a laborious new regulatory proceeding, including lengthy periods of public comment, drafting and mandated reanalysis.
...
Bush's aides are acutely aware of the political risks of completing their regulatory work too late. On the afternoon of Bush's inauguration, Jan. 20, 2001, his chief of staff issued a government-wide memo that blocked the completion or implementation of regulations drafted in the waning days of the Clinton administration that had not yet taken legal effect.
...
"Through the end of the Clinton administration, we were working like crazy to get as many regulations out as possible," said Donald R. Arbuckle, who retired in 2006 after 25 years as an OMB official. "Then on Sunday, the day after the inauguration, OMB Director Mitch Daniels called me in and said, 'Let's pull back as many of these as we can.' "
...
Clinton's appointees wound up paying a heavy price for procrastination. Bush's team was able to withdraw 254 regulations that covered such matters as drug and airline safety, immigration and indoor air pollutants. After further review, many of the proposals were modified to reflect Republican policy ideals or scrapped altogether.
So lots to do in the coming years. At least we can send Palin back to the Fortress of Solitude where her and her husband can resume building momentum to support the secession of Alaska from the US. Maybe Russia will take them.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

2008 Presidential Election Day

 
So excited. I've been waiting 8 years for this day. It's like Christmas, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, Kwanzaa, Chinese New Year, and the release day of every video game I've ever wanted. It's time to undumben the Presidential office, and all afflicted institutions.
Thanks to rosstralia for the wonderful Lego Obama clip.

The only thing I will miss about the GOP will be the consistent behavior so fecund for fodder. What will Tina Fey do now, other than make hit TV shows? Will John Stewart still have a job? Will running in a political office still be an attractive lampoon mechanism for Stephen Colbert? Let's wait and see.

On the rare chance that McCain gets elected, I have only this to say: please don't die.

Monday, October 27, 2008

Dead Space look good...play bad

Let me clarify that statement.

I was able to procure the new EA developed/produced title Dead Space for my PC through a friend whose S.O. works there. I was warned that the controls were funky on the PC, and that I should use an Xbox360 controller to avoid the standard keyboard/mouse configuration.

I was initially thinking, 'how bad could it be', then I installed and played it.

Yikes. Mouse controls are soft and loose, not crisp and defined like most 1st or 3rd person shooters. Mouse sensitivity options are useless.

At first I was thinking, well maybe they designed this because it makes the gameplay more visceral in that you're more vulnerable to attacks. Then, after a few rounds with some gnarly looking necromorphs, it was clear that the control schema was simply ported over from console design to the PC without any kind of discrete mapping or optimization. LAME!

Why does a development house like EA spend all this time making a great game, then hobble it for one platform? Oh wait...we're talking about EA developing PC games. Ahhh....ok...making sense now.

Stuff on the internets indicates that the issue was raised to EA, and the response was:
"Dead Space for PC is an equivalent experience to that on consoles. The controls are different and customizable, but we feel it's in the best ability for the players to match what the console experience is like."
The PC review from IGN, a site I usually rely on for reviews and details on new and upcoming media, was positive, and a closer read indicates that a device other than keyboard/mouse was used for the evaluation. It would have been interesting to see what the score would've been had they used the standard PC controls. It is noteworthy that the review doesn't draw attention to why they employed an Xbox360 controller (or similar device). I wonder if they had any prompting from EA. If so, that's downright dastardly of IGN

Here's hoping they get a patch out that fixes this, otherwise, I'm going to have to invest in a nice, used, wired controller. How ironic. Folks like to play these kinds of games because of the better sense of accuracy, and now the PC is being relegated to mimic console controls. I weep for the future.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Solid Gold...in your coffee?

While preparing my beverage the other morning, the brand name of the creamer took me back to the 80s. I never realized that Diddy was dancing back then...wow! He's so talented. A Solid Gold dancer.




Will the sequel be Hannukah on Venus?

I love The Flaming Lips. Bonus to you and me, they're in a film called 'Christmas on Mars'.

Weird? You haven't heard their Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots then. Apparently, their Fight Test EP had a trailer of the movie. I'm so late to the game.

While the movie's in release in *select* theaters, a CD-DVD set including the movie and soundtrack is coming out in November.

These guys are by far one of the best things to ever come out of Ohio. Family and friends reading this, you know it's true.

Friday, October 17, 2008

Palin for President

My new favorite site.

Looks like it's getting updated each day.

Can't wait to see what happens with the diplomas.

WTF? New Bioshock 2 trailer


Bioshock was one of the COOLEST games ever. It redefined 1st-person shooters. I'm still tripping out on the gameplay, graphics, storyline, and replay value. Here's hoping that Irrational Games continues developing quality games for this IP.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

This just in: Democratic administrations better for your investment

According to a NYTimes piece (sourced from Bloomberg Financial Markets), $10,000 invested in the S.& P. stock market would be worth $11,733 if invested under Republican presidents and $300,671 for Democratic presidents, assuming a compound rate of 8.9 percent over nearly 40 years (the period of time during which either a Republican or Democratic president was in office).
They also indicate what the return would've been had Hoover's administration been considered.

Note that the period where the investment has the greatest return is during Clinton's administration.

Hmmm.

Current president: can't think for himself, has difficulty speaking in clear, articulate sentences, dragged America down a couple rungs in the eyes of the world, ran country using fear tactics; the economy suffers.
Note: couldn't get impeached no matter how many child molesters or CIA agent outers he protected.

Clinton: charismatic, intelligent, could articulately speak to any audience, worked with Dems and GOP congresspeople to get a balanced budget (a first in over 30 years, at the time), had crazy dope foreign policy skills (restoration of Haitian president, Israeli-Palestinian peace accord, peace negotiations with Protestants/Catholics in Ireland, etc), 4% unemployment + more; the economy boomed.
Note: Newt Gingrich and Kenneth Starr led the way to waste taxpayer dollars to impeach him for a blowjob.

Teabag

Usually in the mornings I have English Breakfast or Plantation Mint tea, but today all that changed.

I experienced all that is I Love Lemon. Madness I tell you...madness!

Note the crappy photo quality (or is it user error?) from my iPhone.

I'm fortunate that I didn't have this experience while savoring its goodness.

Friday, October 10, 2008

This just in: cool people admit they would have Tina Fey's baby

See the SNL VP Debate?

Nitro pump for Boddington's

Went to Ben 'n Nick's on College Ave last night with some old co-workers.

As luck would have it, they had Boddington's on tap, AND poured from the nitro tap, which means the head was extra creamy, so of course, I got a stein.
And to add to the Citysearch comments, they do have free wifi, but the signal was weak, so disconnected the iPhone from the network and ran it on 3G instead. All better.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Plan C (If McCain/Palin are elected, and I haven't the will)

Just came across this great piece over at InfoWorld about Americans being able to offshore themselves if IT jobs continue the exodus.
Costa Rica sounds sweet, but I've always wanted to go to Israel and get my kosher on. Regardless, it's an awesome thing to see a more integration of a markets, needs, and talent. Feels like a Schoolhouse Rock spot.

I hear there's mashies on the youteletubbies

Check out the "W." film channel on youtube. Visitors can make video mashups with the content provided. Oliver Stone has a welcome spot, in which he indicates that he's picking a winner, and the prize is well over a million dollars...not really.

Even if you don't make a mashup, there are some great clips of Dubya in inaction during his great prisonmate ass-raping of the world during the past 8 years.

Donkeys are usually heavier than elephants

The Economist has a Global Electoral College tool on its site. It allows people from across the world to select their country and vote for a U.S. Presidential nominee

What's that mean? You say? Economist? Isn't that a elite media institution that uses multi-syllabic words designed to befuddle Joe Six Pack on Main Street? I'm sure that's the argument that sweet little barb-toothed  Palin would project given the results: the world is choosing Obama.
During debate last night, I was expecting to see 'the gloves come off' from McCain, as Palin indicated they would. The gloves must've been from McCain's proctologist employed in a quick pre-debate probing. Everything seemed to be relatively smooth, and I didn't see much sting from McCain, given that the policy of fear first raised from the dead by Dubya and Cheney is still being carted around by the current GOP nominees. Looks like the U.S. wants Obama as well.

One of my personal highlights
M: ...in his short career, he does not understand our national security challenges. ... We don't have the time for on-the-job training.
O: It's true. There are some things I don't understand," Obama said. "I don't understand how we ended up invading a country that had nothing to do with 9/11" while failing to capture Osama bin Laden.
 A Forbes poll also reveals much of the same:
 
 

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

A-game for the AP

I'm loving the comedic coverage from the AP regarding the U.S. 2008 Presidential race.

Highlights here:
Of course, the stock market's plunge was a popular topic among the comics, with Letterman devoting his Top Ten list to "Ways to Make the Financial Crisis More Fun." Ranked in second place: "Enjoy the blank stare when Katie Couric asks Sarah Palin what the FDIC stands for."

He also poked fun at Palin's gaffe when, addressing a group Sunday, she referred to Afghanistan as "our neighboring country."

"Apparently," cracked Letterman, "she can see bin Laden's cave from her house."

On Comedy Central's "The Colbert Report," host Stephen Colbert took an approving look back at Thursday's vice presidential debate.

"Both candidates surpassed expectations," he said. "Sarah Palin proved she could speak. And Joe Biden proved he could STOP speaking."

And NBC "Tonight" show host Jay Leno called attention to a candidate for governor of Bangkok who assaulted a TV reporter for asking him tough questions on the air.

"Today Sarah Palin said, 'You can do THAT? Where's Katie Couric?'"
And here:
"John McCain's campaign has closed their offices in Michigan and they say they won't try to compete for votes there," noted NBC "Late Night" host Conan O'Brien on Monday. "Apparently this is part of McCain's strategy to try to win votes only in the original 13 colonies."

"John McCain blew off Michigan! Well, I know how they feel," said CBS "Late Show" host David Letterman. McCain canceled an appearance on Letterman's show two weeks ago."

7 1/2 Floor...700 Billion...Coincidence? I think not.

A little while ago I was at World Savings (part of Golden West Financial) in, which later got bought by Wachovia, which then severed a multitude of jobs, and is about to get put in Wells Fargo's grocery bag.

SFGate ran a piece about the Sandlers, a husband and wife team who started World Savings and had their headquarters located in Oakland, and who got out of the mortgage business about the time when I left. Very shrewd couple...or evil diabolical architects of fiduciary vampiricism?

Regardless, it appears that their Wachovia stock is going to get a whole lot more valuable. Although I must say, we had a very Being John Malkovich orientation process at World.

The orientation consisted of getting to know how many branches they opened up, what was the first branch, how Herb and Marion Sandler met, etc. It was almost like...7 1/2 Floors.

Unfortunately, there seems to be little peace for taxpayers and the lot of their accursed kind. We get to bail out everyone. It's amazing how 'FREE MARKET WILL PROVIDE' the politicians are, but when the shit hits the fan, we get a Karl Marx solution.

Monday, October 6, 2008

Answers at Ask.com

This is a shameless plug made in favor of the shareholders (i.e. me) and internet denizens like yourselves.

We launched a completely revamped site today. Most noticeable, is the removal of the left hand navigation frame that contained the "Narrow Your Search and " Related Search" features. Frame design as a whole was streamlined to provide less clutter on the screen and more information relating to a query. In short, we redesigned to focus on providing answers, so people can avoid the constant clicking of a link, then clicking back to return to an initial search result page.

The site now presents "blended results", which mean that each blue link resulting from a search can contain content matches from various sources.
Various agencies reporting on the release liken it to a harkening waaaaay back in the 90s, when it was askjeeves.com and people actually provided answers/results for queries. I suppose it is in a way, but now the responses are fed by various external data sources and our own proprietary search algorithms.

Are we now considered a "core" search engine? That will be left up to the users. We're certainly taking actions on the traffic data, to understand what people are looking for, and how they look for it.

We've also acquired Lexico, the parent of dictionary.com, thesarus.com. and reference.com, so expect to see more integration in the future. These services fall directly in line with the new direction of Ask.com: quickly providing answers to users asking questions.
 
Check the new site out. Send feedback, although I can't guarantee you'll get a response you will feel better after getting it off your chest.

Friday, October 3, 2008

Well, she didn't wear an ear bud

On the whole, I found the VP debate to be pretty anticlimactic, but interesting.

I found Biden to be better than expected. He was pretty much to the point, and smartly remained focused on highlighting the differences between McCain and Obama, and portraying Obama in a more positive light, thereby emphasizing the skills he'd use when supporting the President.

Palin did better than I expected, which isn't saying much given that the bar was set so low, all she had to do was show up, smile, talk about Joe Six Pack, and talk about how silly all that crazy political talk sounded since she's such a Washington outsider. Palin seemed to take more jabs at Biden, and didn't always address the moderator's questions. I found her folksy 'small-town' colloquialisms to be insulting, as it's reminiscent of Dubya, another self-coined 'Washington outsider'. She reminded me of Charles Montgomery Burns when he ran for governor.

I heard that Palin's debate talent rests on the fact that she leverages the theatrical element, rather than relying on facts, numbers, and y'know...anything that would establish political data points used to construct a trend, which could be used as a predictor for future behavior. She pretty much smiled, acted cutesy, delivered barbs, and dropped a few numbers here and there, which were her clumsiest moments. Facts-schmacts.

I found the reactions to global warming hilarious. Palin basically said she didn't want to point fingers at causes, while Biden indicated that you probably won't be able to come up with a solution to a problem if you don't identify a cause. Her constant comments about Alaska being an energy-producing state were vomit-inducing. Alaska's untapped fields aren't going to provide a long-term solution to the world's addiction to fossil fuels...not while the U.S consumes 25% of it.

My favorite moment related to taxes. There are mountains of spam moving around about how broke we'll be if Obama comes into office because of his record of voting to raise taxes (94 times). Palin called this out, and Biden clarified it as being an inaccurate statement, while leveraging the same rationale to McCain's record and indicating by the same logic McCain voted to raise them 477 times.
I walked away from it feeling better about Biden. Palin delivered barbs and did her best to try to make herself and McCain seem like a voice of change, which was downright laughable. The Obama movement was launched with the theme of change, and gathered so much momentum the only way the GOP could counter was to get someone REALLY inexperienced, and make Palin seem like a moose-eyed newbie, even when Obama's only 3 years older than her. It appears that the less experienced she is, the better, since it's closer to Joe Six Pack, and that is who she's talking to in her fireside chats.

There was a new word mentioned, exceptionalism, thanks to Sarah Palin, the spiritual torch-carrier for imaginistic langualogy in the same breath as Dubbya. Voice of change indeed.

She did much better than her recent Couric interview:
Couric: You have a 72-year-old running mate - is that kind of a risky thing to say, insinuating that Joe Biden's been around a while?

Palin: Oh no, it's nothing negative at all. He's got a lot of experience and just stating the fact there, that we've been hearing his speeches for all these years. So he's got a tremendous amount of experience and, you know, I'm the new energy, the new face, the new ideas and he's got the experience.

Couric: And when it comes to establishing your worldview, I was curious, what newspapers and magazines did you regularly read before you were tapped for this to stay informed and to understand the world?

Palin: I've read most of them, again with a great appreciation for the press, for the media.

Couric: What, specifically?

Palin: Um, all of them, any of them that have been in front of me all these years.

Couric: Can you name a few?

Palin: I have a vast variety of sources where we get our news, too. Alaska isn't a foreign country, where it's kind of suggested, "Wow, how could you keep in touch with what the rest of Washington, D.C., may be thinking when you live up there in Alaska?" Believe me, Alaska is like a microcosm of America.
 I think I can see Alaska from here...must make me a geographer!

Thursday, October 2, 2008

VP Debate pre-show details

The VP debate's on tonight! See what channels offer it where you live.

Seen the AP piece on the recent bout of network hosts blasting the VP candidates? It's fairly one-sided because, well, we haven't seen this much of a sub-par GOP VP nominee since Quayle ran with GHW Bush. She's an unstoppable force of fodder. The bar's been lowered so far, that she'll be seen as a competent candidate as long as she remains standing, maintains that spooky smile, and utters a few incomprehensible words.

And be warned...if her hair isn't in a bob, then she's wearing an earpiece, so her handlers can bail her out.

In the event you don't like additional mouse-clicks, here's the highlights from the article:

"Last night during an interview on CBS, Sarah Palin said, 'One of my best friends is a lesbian and I love her dearly.' After hearing this, Bill Clinton said, 'Prove it.'"
_O'Brien, NBC's "Late Night."
___
"I love this show! It's like the first season of 'Lost' only it makes less sense."
_Stewart, Comedy Central's "The Daily Show".
___
"It's been reported that John McCain is taking an herbal supplement to improve his memory. Apparently McCain is having trouble remembering why he picked Sarah Palin."
_O'Brien, NBC's "Late Night."
___
"Great day for Sarah Palin. She has been practicing for the big debate tomorrow night. Palin's staff has tried to find a stand-in to pretend to be Joe Biden. But so far all they've come up with is a tree stump. Which actually sounds about right."
_Craig Ferguson, CBS'"Late Late Show."
___
"This is for all the marbles, this debate tomorrow night. And Sarah Palin is nothing if not diligent. She's working hard on preparing for the debate with Joe Biden. Earlier today in Arizona, we just heard, she shot a donkey."
_Letterman, CBS'"Late Show."
___
"Now we all know Gov. Palin has a lot of foreign policy experience because from Alaska, she can see Russia. More to the point, Russia is on the other side of the international dateline from Alaska. It's tomorrow there. So when Palin looks at it, she's actually seeing the future."
_Stephen Colbert, Comedy Central's "The Colbert Report."
___
"The vice presidential debate is tomorrow night. Joe Biden, already gearing up. I understand he went to the hair salon, told the guy to put a little more on top ... And Sarah Palin she's getting ready for tomorrow's debate, too. I understand she now knows all three branches of government."
_Jay Leno, NBC's "Tonight" show
___
"Teams of technicians have been working around the clock trying to figure out how to run an Internet cable directly into the back of (Palin's) skull."
_Jimmy Kimmel, ABC's "Jimmy Kimmel Live."

Notorious


Might be a DVD rental, but I think my money's going to be on Stone's 'W.' biopic.
[GHWB: Who do you think you are? A Kennedy? You're a Bush! Starting acting like one.]

I'm a fan of Biggie fo sho, and he was undoubtedly one of the best MCs to grab the mic, but right now I want to see Dubya's legacy skewered and roasted over a hot pit of voter vengeance.

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

That's what we call meat on my planet

IGN has a great piece on bad comic book turned movies. I'm truly curious to know if that unreleased 1994 version is worse than the '05 and '07 iteration.

As I was watching this horrible clip, I found myself unable to pull away. It was like being in a speeding, out of control car, and knowing you're going to crash into a telephone pole.

I also found the soundtrack seemed very familiar, and given that it's a Roger Corman production (king of the B-movies), I said to myself, "Self, didn't you see another Corman film when you were a kid with that same soundtrack?" Thanks to the internets, I can say "Yes." It was Corman's 'Battle Beyond the Stars'. Revel in the pre-A-Team George Peppard campy goodness.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Mysterious Barack UK Underground ads

During a recent trip abroad to the UK, we took the tube (totally kicks BART's ass) and saw a series of billboards at various Underground stations.

One that generated the most curiosity was one of Barack Obama in front of 10 Downing Street given that our English cousins aren't casting any ballots.

I just learned that the ads were all part of a campaign launched by The Times. Tricky Brits.

Thank you Paul

When I first really started to get into films, Paul Newman was one of my favorite actors...Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid.

I'm starting to feel old when all these actors I grew up with are dropping off, and concerned that there are only throngs of Hanna Montanas to replace them.

I'm voting Republican, so I can go to Iran

Came back from a trip overseas (where news about the corporate bailout took up a generous chunk), but was pleased to see some videos relayed my way, as they were the juicy bits of email wheat in an otherwise sea of chaff.

One of these videos convinced me to vote Republican. It just feels so much cozier...so I can stay in Iraq...so I can go to Iran!


The other, well, it's a great tidbit of our nation's most fav high functioning moron.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Shepard Fairey drops a bomb...paints the bomb?

Probably best known for his 'Obey' work, which features a stylized rendition of Andre the Giant's face, Shepard Fairey is now a tad more mainstream, albeit in making some provocative pieces pertaining to BushCo, the war on terror, free (or lack there of) speech, all inspiring critical thought. He's got a show going in SF right now at WhiteWallsSF.
 

Reminds me that I need to replace a button on my pants

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button looks good. I totally dig David Fincher as a director. Brad Pitt, Cate Blanchett, and Tilda Swinton star in the adapted for screen F. Scott Fitzgerald's short story, which also happens to be available online.

Seems like a nice December-timed release. We'll have a new President by then, and hopefully a new direction. Perhaps we can run the clock back on the moral and ethical decay BushCo laid down, and return to youthful, yet savvy and sound country.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Palin's yahoo email password is 'password'

Or something close no doubt. Some moderately clever evil-doers hacked her yahoo account.

What's so funny about it (or sad depending on how you look at it) was that she was using it to conduct public (read: as an elected official) communications.
Palin's chief of staff, Michael Nizich, sent her an e-mail August 22 with the subject line, "Using Royalty Oil to Lower the Cost of Fuel for Alaskans." The subject line of another e-mail from Nizich reads "CONFIDENTIAL Ethics Matter."
The technical grasp of the GOP nominees is coming across as strikingly and shockingly subpar.

I'm vying for a spot in a reality show

Finally my love of the thespian arena and gaming intersect with MTV Networks, Spike TV, and Microsoft Corporation partnership to bring a bunch of dorks together in "...a real-life televised Gears of War 2 adventure."

I've submitted my questionnaire and emailed in the pitch entailing why I should be a member of Delta Squad.
"...just like in the game, challenges, tough decisions and sacrifices stand in the path of victory. In a fast paced reality show that feels like an alternate reality game brought to life, your team must work together to reach the ultimate goal: Becoming the first gamers in the world to play through the entire saga of Gears of War 2 in early October."
In light of Patton Oswalt's piece on George Lucas, my geekiness is getting in the way of my nerdiness.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

I can see Russia from my house...

Thank you Tina Fey.

Housekeeping or precursor to The Road?

A nice summation of the current state of the economy from SFGate:
WINNERS: Bank of America: Buys Merrill Lynch in a shotgun sale for $50 billion, creating the largest U.S. financial services company. Warren Buffett: His insurance holdings stand to benefit from AIG's weakened position, and he could buy some or all of the company at a big discount. Taxpayers: The federal government refuses to throw financial lifelines to Lehman Bros. or AIG that could have put taxpayers on the hook for billions of dollars in bad loans. It also refuses to pay the ousted chief executives of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac up to $24 million in exit packages.

LOSERS: Merrill Lynch: One of the best-known and most respected companies in American history vanishes overnight in a desperate sale to Bank of America. Lehman Bros.: It survived the Civil War and the Great Depression, but it can't escape the credit crisis and files for bankruptcy protection as it closes. Washington Mutual: The Seattle thrift was flying high amid the real estate boom, but it crashes just as spectacularly. Now it reportedly looks for a buyer as it tries to avoid insolvency.
HOSERS: Current Presidential nominees.

Can we finally put the whole lipstick-gate thing behind us? No one owns that word, and who gives a damn if she can field dress a moose? It's not like living in AK gives Palin years of valuable foreign policy experience.

I don't care about her baby and her baby having babies, or McCain delivering sermons on how he's more patriotic than Obama, I care about getting the economy stabilized, the job market improved, and the perception of Americans improved in the international sector. It's a sad state of affairs when the majority of Americans buy into the political campaigning and spin doctoring designed to cast candidates in more favorable light, especially when it detracts from 'real issues'. And please GOP/McCain campaingers...spare us the all the 'elite media' tripe you've been spewing. Just because you're not the loveable darling now that Dubya and Cheney salted it for you, doesn't mean you need to whine.
Thank you Dilbert. You so wonderfully characterizes the legacy of the Bush administration, and what we'll [hopefully] be recovering from in the next Presidential term.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Using internet = System Architect Commander Leader

Sweet! Living in AK gives Palin insight into foreign policy! Wow! I was under the impression that her insight was limited to the depth of a moose colon! Silly me!

McCain in the Membrane ya'll!

Hi! I'm BART one-point-oh

WTF BART? You make a new website that's awesome and kinda 2.0-ey, and then you start considering hiking fares *again* during high commute times?

Hey! I've got an idea! If the current system is rated to support 500,000 daily riders, and there are only 370,000 at present, and officials are saying that 500k is pushing it why don't we add more trains which lessen wait times and train load concerns?

Yeah! Then BART would be less crowded, have more available trains LIKE OTHER METRO RAIL SYSTEMS.

This just in: don't penalize people for taking public transportation! And if you're going to hike rates, at least offer some kind of value to commuters...yes, it's going to cost a little more, but trains run more frequently and you might actually be able to sit once a month instead of always crushing into the human mass of armpit vapor punctuated with the occasional mystery fart.

Maybe BART should spend less time/money developing the leak-proof coffee cup that doesn't work well, and more time thinking about how to improve operations while providing cost and environmentally conscious riders an alternative to driving.

I'm just saying, if that's what your standards are

My bestest buddy Gabe hooked me up with Patton Oswalt's "Werewolves and Lollipops" album that we'd listened to while driving down to Big Sur, where we TOTALLY saw Natalie Portman, for some beer drinking...er...camping with another old school homie.

Gee, gosh, darn he's funny. Ross prefers Jim Gaffigan, and characterized Patton as edgier, but not as funny.

While Jim has some good stuff, I really dig on Patton's political sensibilities. Take his 'The Dukes of Hazzard' piece. Brilliant.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

F.E.A.R. 2: Project Origin

Oh this is going to be glorious. I won't go into the drama surrounding the licensing issues that have been plaguing this game, but it appears the dust has settled, and it's going to be called F.E.A.R. 2: Project Origin.

What was the first F.E.A.R, and what the hell does that acronym mean? First Encounter Assault Response. Think of the X-files directed by John Woo combined with aspects of the Clone Wars, Resident Evil, and the Japanese horror elements present in movies such as The Ring. You play as a nameless badass and terminate the cloned army of some psychic lab child born in DARPA-shrouded secrecy. One of the coolest gameplay mechanics was the use of "reflex time", which was another way of saying "bullet time". Employing this tool shifted the visual spectrum a tad, particle modeling increases, enemies moved slower, but you moved faster, enabling you to bust caps on a platoon sized onslaught of gun-toting automatons.

At the end of the first game there's a huge explosion and you're rescued via helicopter.

There were some lackluster expansion packs that I never played, but this sequel picks up right after the end of the first game, and continues to explore the mysterious little girl, Alma, who's since been freed from the confines described in the first game.

Environments seemed to have been reportedly improved, as the first game suffered from little deviation in terrain and atmosphere. The gore factor has been drastically ramped up, and there are some crazy new weapons.

The title is scheduled to release 2-10-09 in the States. I'm so excited to get my fear on.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Search algorithm and heuristics...not quite there

A very honest question, to be sure, and unfortunately I don't think this visitor found what s/he was looking for when they arrived at a post I had on Obama.

At least the post has some decent indexing, or perhaps had their mind in the gutter about next President-elect?

Show me your privacy...now!

Feel good about your privacy? This recent CNET article highlights how the current administration (read: NSA) exploits loopholes that allows them to profile individuals using the intermediary communication providers between primary service providers.
The massive collection of customer data comes down to the interplay of two specific issues: First, thousands of companies play small, niche support roles in the wireless phone industry, and as such these firms learn quite a bit about the calling habits of millions of U.S. citizens. Second, the laws relating to information sharing and wiretapping specifically regulate companies that provide services to the general public (such as AT&T and Verizon), but they do not cover the firms that provide services to the major carriers or connect communications companies to one other.
...
With the passage of laws like the FISA Amendments Act and the USA Patriot Act, in most cases, requests for customer information come with a gag order, forbidding the companies from notifying the public, or the end users whose calling information is being snooped upon.
...
So any entity--from tower provider, to a third-party spam filter, to WAP gateway operator to billing to call center customer service--can [...] be compelled to assist in silence. They likely don't volunteer because of reputation and contractual obligations, but they won't resist either.
That means that Jack Bauer may come visit you to administer electro-shock therapy to your nipples should you be selected for profiling, and targeted for...evaluation.

Who would play Kuato?



PS: some of you on the Google Groups might have noticed some jerkface assclown spammed the group with some porn themed postings. I've since reported them to the Google Hive. Let's see what happens. I'd originally left the group open so anyone could post, but I've now restricted it. The internets are an amazing place that we each have to police. Let's make the world a better place...one keystroke at a time.

Monday, September 8, 2008

BART 2.0

I'm digging the new BART site redesign and improved functionality.

They finally made their service consider the fact that some people need to plan a trip from a location close to a BART station to another station or to another nearby location by a station.

That's a lot of "ay-shun", and is total alliteration.
I'm prone to roll employing loquation, and in kindergarten I hated equations.
Missed the Cuban missile crisis and threats of nuclear obliteration.
Before I handle food, I conduct a thorough ablution.
Sarah Palin promotes theory of creation, while abstinence didn't deter her younger generation from fornication...

I digress....where was I?

Before, a site user had to copy and paste address information to find the nearest station, then go through another step of selection that station and the other end point, which was a total pain in the 'a'.

Now when I want to find out the closest station and route to the new California Academy of Sciences in Golden Gate Park, while also planning my trip itinerary from my starting BART station to the closest station near the Academy, I can do it all in one step!







They also have an embedded quick planner widget now.



Everything's coming up Milhouse.

Friday, September 5, 2008

Why John Stewart makes it nice

I've seen this on a few different sites, but being that I'm limited to basic cable I enjoy John Stewart episodes streamed over the internets.

Here's one that nails Karl Rove, Bill O'Reilly, Dick Morris, and some other d-bags.
I'd love to see one with Sarah Palin and her views on religion and the separation of Church and State, and how effective abstinence is as the sole option in sex education for adolescents.

Hatey...it's not just a country

I heart the GOP and all its southern voters who embody the divisive nature of politics, as they pander to the least-common denominatin' cracka-ass-cracka in the hopes of beating the dead horse that we call 'fear-based politics'.

The newest flounder?
Speaking to reporters Thursday, Rep. Lynn Westmoreland of Grantville, Ga., described the Obamas as members of an "elitist-class ... that thinks that they're uppity," according to The Hill, a Capitol Hill newspaper.
I'm guessing that shortly after his press conference Westmoreland immediately felt hungry after having spitting so much hateful venom, and felt intense pangs of regret for the now almost defunct Sambo's restaraunt chain.

When pressed the next day about making the comment he said
...he didn't know that "uppity" was commonly used as a derogatory term for blacks seeking equal treatment. Instead, he referred to the dictionary definition of the word as describing someone who is haughty, snobbish or has inflated self-esteem.
Sooo...it's ok then to use the dictionary term of a word, disavow any cracka-ass-cracka connotations (even though he is a Suthin' gentleman, and lived in the region before and after the Civil Rights movement), and adamantly indicate that if he had to do it again he'd use the same word? That's awesome. Seems fair to ding Michelle Obama for taking her 'for the first time I feel proud to be an American' remark out of context and lambast her.

I cannot wait until we breed hatey people like this out of the gene-pool. Here's to Lynn's kids marrying a non-Anglo, so he can learn to love his "uppity" grandkids.

Man this porn looks good

Seth Rogen and Kevin Smith come together to make a movie? Oh sweet celluoid nectar of the silver screen...er...my TV at home, I cannot wait to revel in your extra-feature laden DVD.

To have the Apple guy say the words "more like Glen and Gary suck Ross's giant meaty c--k" just sucks the blood out of your inner Miss Nancy's complexion.

Thankfully, the film ended up garnering an R instead of the dreaded NC-17.

Incidentally, for more insight on how movies receive ratings (and for an interview with Kevin Smith on how he had to fight for R ratings for Clerks), I highly recommend the documentary, This Film is Not Yet Rated.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

There was an RNC?

What is so great about Sarah Palin, other than the fact that she looks better than Joe Biden?

The malarky surrounding the recent Republican convention was downright hilarity. Since when does a lame-ass VP-nominee feel the need to take shots at the Presidential nominee, especially when she one-ups Obama on the whole 'inexperience' issue.
She is younger and less experienced than the first-term Illinois senator, and brings an ethical shadow to the ticket. A governor for just 20 months, she was two-term mayor of Wasilla, Alaska, a town of 6,500 where the biggest issue is controlling growth and the biggest civic worry is whether there will be enough snow for the Iditarod dog-mushing race.
...
The pick earned McCain praise Friday from evangelicals and other social conservatives who have been skeptical of him. "Conservatives will be thrilled with this pick," said Greg Mueller, a conservative GOP strategist.

The price for that support could be high. Palin's lack of experience undercuts GOP charges that Obama is not ready to be commander in chief. McCain said in April that he was determined to avoid a pick like Dan Quayle, the little-known Indiana senator whom George H.W. Bush put on his ticket in 1988. The choice proved embarrassing.
Her comment about Obama, talking one way to some voters and a different way to others was laughable. I'd have liked to see her deliver the same style speech she gave at her old Pentecostal church.
"Pray for our military men and women who are striving to do what is right. Also, for this country, that our leaders, our national leaders, are sending [U.S. soldiers] out on a task that is from God," she exhorted the congregants. "That's what we have to make sure that we're praying for, that there is a plan and that that plan is God's plan."
...
"I think God's will has to be done in unifying people and companies to get that gas line built, so pray for that," she said.
I recommend you check out the link to that speech, as there's a charming video that allows for a more visceral experience of the crazy. The pastor, Ed Kalnins? He makes Barack Obama's former pastor Jeremiah Wright look like Mother Teresa.
What you see in a terrorist -- that's called the invisible enemy. There has always been an invisible enemy. What you see in Iraq, basically, is a manifestation of what's going on in this unseen world called the spirit world. ... We need to think like Jesus thinks. We are in a time and a season of war, and we need to think like that. We need to develop that instinct. We need to develop as believers the instinct that we are at war, and that war is contending for your faith. ... Jesus called us to die. You're worried about getting hurt? He's called us to die. Listen, you know we can't even follow him unless you are willing to give up your life. ... I believe that Jesus himself operated from that position of war mode. Everyone say "war mode." Now you say, wait a minute Ed, he's like the good shepherd, he's loving all the time and he's kind all the time. Oh yes he is -- but I also believe that he had a part of his thoughts that knew that he was in a war.
Interestingly enough, the Wasilla Assembly of God website is now unavailable except for the holy cache. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that the McCain-Palin campaign leaders made a quick call up to AK and had to enact some damage control. Odd how we're not seeing any media backlash on this one, though. Dare I suggest that Ed's comments aren't perceived as inflammatory because he's white, and more in line with the current administration's take on the "War on Terror"?

So hurray for the Palin nomination! Thanks Sarah, for making the current Republican party seem like a bunch of angry, fearful, hateful wackjobs. It makes it easier for everyone on election day.

I, like George Washington, favor a heady dose of the separation of Church and State...otherwise, y'know...we get all fundamentally suicidally and killy-like. Just like those terrorists your pastor denegrates!
Of all the animosities which have existed among mankind, those which are caused by difference of sentiments in religion appear to be the most inveterate and distressing, and ought most to be deprecated. I was in hopes that the enlightened and liberal policy, which has marked the present age, would at least have reconciled Christians of every denomination so far that we should never again see the religious disputes carried to such a pitch as to endanger the peace of society.
(George Washington, letter to Edward Newenham, October 20, 1792; from George Seldes, ed., The Great Quotations, Secaucus, New Jersey: Citadel Press, 1983, p. 726.)

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Chrome, you're the chromiest

Chrome is good...aside from the whole theological takeover parody I suggested, the browser is sweet. My favorite is the 'stats for nerds' tool, which lets nerd nerd it up in the nerdiest way possible. You will note that I am probably a nerd given the Wikipedia page open in this scenario.
Pretty cool stuff. As one comment I saw on ars, Chrome has "the snappy". It opens fast, pages render fast, and there's some clever architecture built into it to make the search experience better. I can see Ubiquity-like features on the horizon. I like how if one tab crashes, the multi-thread architecture [supposedly] limits the amputation to the affected tab, and not the entire browser session.
Google even went ahead and put together a clever stylized online googlebook with renderings of the developers explaining the design approach and some of Chrome underpinnings and why it works the way it does. It's open-source, so folks can add features and fixes as with Mozilla's Firefox.
Evil, clever bastards.

Google forays with a new open-source religion

Bolstered by its continued success in generating billions of ad dollars, strong brand recognition, the creation of an iPhone competitor (based on the Android platform), its forthcoming new browser (with long-term competitors being IE, FF, Safari, and Opera), Google has finally decided to offer its version of theology.

Google's PR department released this statement:
"It's going to be an open-sourced model that allows faith-followers to synergistically strengthen their core beliefs with a ubiquitous de-centralized deity. It's based on the OpenSocial API, which is the foundation for a host of successful web appliances, namely Orkut. We realized that in order to be true to the mantra 'don't be evil', we would need to create a new theological construct in order to legitimize more aggressive revenue-generating advertising models. In addition, we believe that we have something new to offer certain members of various demographics who find themselves removed or disconnected from reality.

As part of an extended development process, our team conducted focus groups with [among others] Second Life denizens, as well as individuals tinkering with cybernetic implants and found that while people enjoy their metaphysical experiences there is a certain degree of spiritual emptiness as we have not yet been able to reduce the human soul to a binary expression, nor digitally quantifying the aforementioned emptiness.

With much experimentation, we discovered as a way to accomplish these tasks, and in doing so, uncovering the means to similarly generate a host appliance capable of monitoring and upgrading soul programs, thereby improving the quality of virtual life. Sergey and Larry dubbed this host: DaemonLord, in a sentimental gesture to a long-lived family of processes well-known in those versed in computer science concepts.

Beta-users of DaemonLord will receive secure access to the development site, and complementary surgery to integrate proprietary mechanisms designed to facilitate the entry into the virtual environment, nicknamed Temple. As the user spends more time in Temple, his or her body would normally atrophy, however Google is committed to maintaining both a healthy body and virtua-soul, so initial testers will be configured with electrical stimulation in order to prevent physical decay.

We plan on maintaining DaemonLord and Temple by the revenue generated by users within the environment, as micro-transactions (similar to papal indulgences) and various implementations of the existing AdSense and AdWords platforms."
Needless to say, there's been some explosive responses from the general user community. Religious leaders have yet to release a formalized comment on the situation, but President Gee-dub did have these questions:
"So...if I snort some of that digitalized nose dust in that there etherland of pagan goodness, will it come up in my pee-pee test that I have to take for Uncle Dick every month?"
...and...
"Does this mean that I can hook up with Sarah Palin in this new-fangled Temple thang? I'm tryin' to talk Laura into a threesome! Man, that Sarah could moose-wrestle me into submission any Temple session!"

Friday, August 29, 2008

Thank you Sarah Palin....mmmm....tasty

I was all fired up to do a little something on Sarah Palin, and found that the dailykos had already delivered a lovely piece on why:
  1. she's ineffective
  2. Alaska is effed, and the GOP is scrambling
  3. the rhetoric used to highlight Obama's 'lack of experience' blows up in the GOPs face with her nomination
  4. the neo-con star chamber, led by His Exalted Evilness Karl Rove still runs things
I'm feeling better every day about the upcoming Presidential election. Haters move out of the way. We're going to have a President who speaks in complete sentences and doesn't make up words without knowing that he's made up a [albeit cool-sounding] word. If only we could install stupidfilter for Dubya, then at least we wouldn't need to contend with his failed policies AND his mind-numbingly lame diction.

Facetown....ghostbook?

Ricky Gervaise = Whoopi Goldberg

I swear to Yahweh, that if both the Facebook movie and Ghost Town come out in the same year, I will gouge out my own eyes, pack the empty sockets with kosher salt, and ram my head against the nearest marble vertex until my skull splits open and I can see my own gray matter patter to the floor and make little bloody smacking sounds when they hit.

And doesn't Téa Leoni look great?! Wow! She's totally hotter here than in 'Bad Boys II'. David Duchovny is a lucky guy, but that's why he gets songs written after him.

Seriously...why did some troll think it was a good idea to make a Facebook movie? Mark Zuckerberg is a d-bag, and Facebook...is a WEBSITE! What's so wonderful about making a movie about a website? Do we really need a movie about a website that puts you in touch with your old friends from elementary school? I'm going to throw this out there: if you're not in touch with them now, maybe it's for a good reason.

Maybe if Facebook started killing people, and they had the whole 'The Ring' thing going for it it might be compelling, but a movie about some dudes who made an exclusive social site for like-minded d-bags at Ivy League universities [good for branding, giving it a solid heritage, pass my snifter of cognac, won't you Reginald?], then rolled it out to the proles [read: State schools], where they effectively tarnished their image forever with the Beacon privacy debacle? What's the denouement? Zuckerberg becomes the youngest billionaire ever, and initiates his own Logan's Run bubbleworld to keep the 30+ folks in check? OK...maybe that's too dated of a film for his 'young' demographic...how about 'The Island'! That was a wonderful tale that probably meshes well with his junior high school experience.

I can't wait for the DVD...so I can film myself burning it on the stack of 'Facebook: The Movie' posters, and make multiple postings of it on youtube...not really...in reality I will just not attend the film in the theater, or in any paid streaming fashion. If I do choose to see it, I'll pirate a copy.

Then again, from the little that's been said about the book, it's supposedly brutal in critique of said Zuckerberg. In this case, it might be worth a viewing...from a pirated source of course.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

My God...It's full of stars

With the same wonder that Dave Bowman expressed when entering monolith-initiated time-space travel, Ubiquity redefines today's web experience.

If you're using Firefox, then you need to install this plugin. It allows you to bring up a contextual command interface where you can perform a variety of tasks from your Firefox browser.

Searching, emailing, integrating maps into email, searching for Flickr pictures, post directly to Twitter...amazing.

Check it out in action:


For example, you install the Ubiquity plug-in, then visit a site you want to email to a friend. Instead of copying your friend's email or site URL, then opening another tab to start a gmail session, you bring up the Ubiquity console and start typing your friend's name. Ubiquity links up with your gmail account to find contacts that match that pattern.

Then select the address you want by arrowing to it and hitting enter, which will cause the another tab open in a gmail session with the recipients email address already populated, with the message you specified, with the link to the page you were visiting.


Simple, but very powerful stuff. It's like wormhole technology for the web.

Oakland needs superheroes

Nobody's put it out there yet, so I'm going to go out on a limb.

We need superheroes in Oakland. A Watchmen-like troupe would suffice. A seething mass of face-punching justice wranglers who can instill a sense of loss and mortality in the d-bags who are robbing local restaurants in the Oakland area. Most people have eaten at least one of these restaurants in the area. I can't back this up on e-paper...I don't have the results of a properly structured social study...but there some discrete quantitative data points numbering three or more (indicating a trend) that concisely tell us that this phenomena is increasing.

We don't need to arm the populace. We just need superheroes.

We need a few people who know what's going down, and where it's going down, so they can be there when it goes down, and twist fools. Someone, somewhere knows where the next round of robberies is going to be. Someone knows who's going to do it. That means the heist is avoidable, or, shall we say, conducive to bringing the proper big scary people who knock down doors and beat/maim/kill...fine...apprehend the bad guys.

We need people who can roll through to Ron Dellums' pad, sneak into his room, nudge him awake from his cozy Depends fortified slumber, whisper in his ear: "You are not doing your job Mr. Mayor...the Edgerlies of your city are running it...do something now, or we will."

We need Chip Johnson to be granted superpowers, so he can bust on fools who pistol-whip workers and patrons, package them for pickup for the cops, then take pictures of the perps, and then post them in his column where he'll expose their names and addresses.

Then...once a semblance of safety is returned to the streets of Oakland, we can turn our attention to the rotting, decrepit, desiccated, and corrupt zombie-like corpse we call City Hall and perform some major reconstructive surgery.

So far I haven't been able to find any postings on Craigslist offering superhero services (although someone's selling a superhero suit). If anyone finds one, please comment with the contact info, so I can get in touch with the person and discuss the role and compensation.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Ziggurat

01


Logan's Run (film).

Warcraft III.


















The uber-panopticon.

Soylent green.

These are all things that come to mind when reading about Timelinks proposal to cram 1 million people into a carbon-neutral footprint pyramid-like 2.3 km structure that does away with the need for cars, a lawn, a garden, personal space, and privacy.
Ridas Matonis, Managing Director of Timelinks, said: “Ziggurat communities can be almost totally self-sufficient energy-wise. Apart from using steam power in the building we will also employ wind turbine technology to harness natural energy resources.”
...
The concept will also aim at a better quality of life for the inhabitants. Transport throughout the complex would be connected by an integrated 360 degree network (horizontally and vertically) so cars would be redundant. Biometrics would provide security with facial recognition technology.
Oh, dude. My dystopic sci-fi novels are sooo right on. Tom Cruise's version of Minority Report here I come! Whoo-hooo!!

Picture it...you walking down the Zig-hall, and a Zig-scanner reads your retina and instantly cross-checks your identity with the Zig-repository, establishes interests from recent email communications, utterances made in your bathroom, recent purchases from the Zig-store, and a Zig-avatar appears and starts walking next to you, slyly suggesting items or services in which you might be interested...like sponsored listings you see in various search engines.
Instead of DUIs or PI crimes, there'll be Zig-infractions and in order to maintain societal balance, there'll be strict re-education policies in place since there's no space for prison...or maybe there'll be a Penal-Zig?

Excursions to the surrounding pastoral areas would be frowned upon, as the lands would be snatched up by mega-conglomerates, and seeded with powerfully mutated agricultural products that aren't so much healthy, as they are cost-effective, so Zig-officials would want to limit the amount of exposure to zigizens (like 'citizen', but for Ziggurat, sweet!) else the highly condensed populace would vector biological contaminents at a brisk pace.

Nations will collapse, and Zig-States will replace modern continent-oriented governmental paradigms. Alliances with neighboring Ziggurats will be established, and battles will be fought to control water sources as they'll be the sources for both hydro-electric power and for treating 1 million people's worth of excrement per Ziggurat.

Urban centers will collapse and will become vestigages of humanity's triumphs and folly, eventually fallen prey to managed lifestyles.

My new home cheer:
Zig-gu-rat!
It's where it's at!
Zig-gu-rat!
It's where it's at!
[repeat it...or else]