Friday, April 18, 2008

Worst. Movie. Ever...oh...and our progeny is doomed

WTF? Isn't the world bad enough with Uwe Boll making movies?

Why would someone ever make a movie about the game Tetris? My mind reels in its inability to understand why anyone would provide funding for this. From the looks of the preview, it's like some Tetris fan's bad wet dream a la 300.

Premise: guys fly huge Tetris blocks around in the air...I guess it's a sport but bigger, but not as big as Rollerball. Guy's brother dies in Tetris match. Brother to avenge death. Filmed in your neighbor's garage via greenscreen.

We are all dumber having knowing someone made this film.

You want to see a relevant and hilarious piece of work? Check out Mark Fiore's White House Life. Oh man.
In a related note, I never found myself that big of a fan of Black Sabbath, probably out of ignorance for actually giving the music a shot after seeing the horrible reality program with Ozzy's family. I stand corrected, and thank Guitar Hero 2 for opening my figurative eyes. It was during gametime that I was able to play War Pigs, and I thought 'sigh...Sabbath...bat-head eater gimmick...lame...' but I needed to beat the song in order to move onto the next level, so I gave it a go.

The song rocks, not just in a pre-metal 1970s rougher-than-Zeppelin kind of way, but in its forthright commentary on war. What I find remarkable is we seem to be expressing the same frustrations and making the same articulations almost 40 years since the song's release.

If the government was run more like a business, then I wonder if Dubya would've been allowed to remain in office. Shareholders would probably have kicked his crappy administration out of office years ago. Why haven't we? Maybe we like the war on terror, and suffer from some prideful ailment that's crippling us from packing things up, which of course we really can't now that we broke it ('it' being the stability of the Middle East). Then again it's not like the current administration is tearing its hair out to attend to majority of people's concerns: jobs, affordable housing, education, etc.

Maybe it's the alluring thought of receiving that juicy economic stimulus package that I won't get because the plan didn't factor in an adjustment for residents living in areas where the cost of living is higher. Oh well, that's just money my great-grandkids would owe the Bank of China anyway.
Ques: How will the US pay for 'economic stimulus package'?
Ans: The US Treasury will write a check for the debt.
Ques: How will the US Treasury finance the check?
Ans: The US Treasruy will borrow the money.
Ques: Where will the US Treasury get the money?
Ans: The US Treasury will sell "paper" at the debt window. [think of your neighborhood checking-cashing facility! yay!]
Ques: Who will buy the "paper"?
Ans: Foreign Central banks interested in US debt (ie China, Saudia Arabia, etc.)
Ques: What will be the interest rate on the loan and what will be the term?
Ans: The rate and term of the loan will be negotiated.
Can we please put Dubya in the Tetris movie, so it'll at least be funny to watch? I also find the mental image of him getting crushed by a giant CG metal block positively hilarious.

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