We're breaking up

It's difficult when you're in a relationship where one partner just doesn't care about the other. No matter how many times the one in pain tries to get the offending partner in line or to logically discuss the issue, the behavior just never stops. In fact, sometimes it gets worse. It's this type of scenario in which I recently found myself. I had been tolerating it for months, and finally I just went ahead and bit the bullet and ended the relationship.

Goodbye Yahoo Mail. It was fun while you didn't serve me up annoying ads or load my computer up with impression cookies. We had a good run. Finally, even though you provide my broadband connection, I just can't bring myself to continue using your self-serving and crappy interface. I'm tired of all the visual spam. I couldn't understand why you continued to blast me with all those horrible Flash ads even when you get money from me every month. Isn't being a phone, mobile, and broadband customer enough for you? Do you really need me to shell out more money to enlist in your ass-raping Mail Plus service? You apparenly don't care. I know you can't be monogamous, and you have relationships with other people, and you treat them the same...even though they don't appreciate your spam in the same vein I've communicated to you.

Well, I've found someone else. Someone who supports IMAP for my mobile device (should I ever need it). Someone who has a cleaner interface, someone who I was actually seeing on the side. Someone who understands that you don't have to clutter the page with shite in order to make your advertising dollars. That's right. I'm with Gmail now...100% all the time. I've already fetched my mail from you, and updated my settings on my Yahoo account so I don't ever have to come to your mean-spirited page ever again. Gmail will take all my Yahoo mail and display it nice and cleanly for me. I might still take advantage of your email aliasing tool, which allows me to create dummy email addresses that pipe to my main account, but again...Gmail will pull all of your tainted content for me, and I never have to see a gaudy ad on your face ever again.

It feels good to be rid of you, Yahoo Mail. I hope you can walk away from this relationship and take something useful with you: listen to your users. They are getting more savvy every day, and they won't continue to settle for your sub-par environment. And by the way...size does matter. Gmail gives me more storage space. I'm up past 6 gigs and counting.

Yahoo Mail users who are in the same abusive relationship and ready to get all 'Farrah Fawcett on a Burning Bed' can find instructions on how to migrate their contacts over to Gmail by exporting them and then fetching your existing Yahoo mail.

End the cycle of violence.

Peace in the middle East, and although I Heart Huckabees, I don't like Mike.