Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Baby, I'll totally hook you up with a tri-level rooftop garden penthouse downtown

What would you say if I was a stock broker, and had managed thousands of Fortune 500 portfolios, including companies represented in your 401k holdings? You'd want me to maintain a public perception of stability and integrity, right: an erect member of the community ever pointing truthward on the moral compass of the financial landscape, yes? Of course you would.

Now say that I had this squeeze on the side, and I wanted to make sure that she knew how deep my pockets is. I wanted this girl to feel this here game, you know wha'm sayin? Word. So... say I slide a couple thousand Berkshire Hathway shares my company owns right on into my lady's account, ya'll ain't gonna trip, right? It's all good, right? Don't hate the playa, hate the game, right?

Then let's say that someone got wind of this little fiduciary collusion, and made a big stink about it [Sheesh...haters]. Say people wanted to fire me for this little itty-bitty thing. Then suppose that my old boss, who just happens to crash at the White House, comes out and supports me in my time of need because he and I go waaaaayyyy back. We used to roll P-gon style back when I was in the DOD.

Would you trip? Would you think it unethical that I did this?

OK, what if instead of managing stocks I was the President of the World Bank and instead of sliding my lady shares of B-H, I hooked her up with a phat compensation package that broke bank rules and smacked of nepotism and was just generally irresponsible. Would you be concerned if I did this?

What if you had some bigshots from the current executive administration make comments like these:
'"What we've said is, yeah, he made mistakes," [White House spokesperson Tony] Snow said. "That pretty much is obvious. On the other hand, it's not a firing offense."'
'"It doesn't seem to be the kind of thing that you would want to see the dismissal of the World Bank president over," [Secretary of State Condi] Rice said. "I hope it will be resolved in a way that is true to what really happened there but also strengthens the bank, which is a really important institution," she added.'
Would it seem like an ironic slap in the face with a metal studded glove laced with salty lemon juice when you know that the World Bank exists to fight poverty on a global scale?

I'm going to go out on a limb here, and say that it's highly probable that I shouldn't remain in the capacity of President, as these actions could be construed as...evil? irresponsible? callous? selfish? a manifestation of a propensity for rolling big pimpin' style? Any one of which doesn't really mesh with the goals of the Bank, given that, y'know, there are like people starving and shit, and I'm like hooking up my girlfriend with stupid cash.

If you haven't guessed, I'm like TOTALLY Paul Wolfowitz.

Let me take it one step further, and say that it casts a further shade, characterized by twilight, upon an administration that continues to fail to offer any kind of accountability, which further amplifies the message to the American people and our global neighbors that this country's leadership lacks a moral core. Please mind that I'm referring to the current White House administration, and not the American people. I'm betting that Americans are hungry for some changes in policy and political attitudes. It's frustrating to know that our children will be paying decades for eight years of bad choices made by one President.

1 comment:

  1. Quit Hat'tin. So what, if you're that ugly and you make a suit made of stock to get laid. Seems logical.

    ReplyDelete